Chaoscopy

Snoozists

2008-10-21T17:20:00.000-07:00

I have a new enemy. The well hidden, but completely un-silent kind.
Our neighbours below have some sort of bizarre resolution that they have, and continue to, fail several times daily. Infact, they fail it in fifteen-minute increments from 5:00am until around 11:45am every, single day. Most noticeably on weekends.

Our neighbours alarm clock isn’t the friendly, calm, Lionel Ritchie, KBIG 101 smooth jazz spewing kind. It is the Doomsday, run-for-shelter-air-raid variety. That almost, industrial metal on metal screech that defies any soul to ignore it. I honestly don’t know how they sleep through it, for periods into minutes, every fifteen-minute interval for hours upon hours.

At first I thought they must have been away for the weekend, yet the erratic periods between on and off, quickly removed that excuse. Shelby soon began to pound the floor with her foot. 5.15am on a Saturday is even a little early for us, particularly after
a favorable night on the red. Pretty soon a few of the neighbours became involved. A common cause if you will. Pam went so far as to go downstairs and confront them. That came after she yelled out the side window a few times. I did the same one morning around 6am. Dylan, the twenty-something unemployed, yet always benevolent (except when it came to talking to his baby’s mama on his cell phone on the sidewalk out the front) came to the door. Eyes full of sleep, a pot and meth hangover from last week’s binge hung like a flag over his body. He seemed genuinely surprised, and ofcourse, apologetic. I then realized the alarm belonged to his mum, or perhaps mum’s boyfriend. It astounded me that he could not hear it, sleeping on the couch outside the room. That was almost on year ago. The alarm continues to screech and squawk to this day, broken by fifteen-minute intervals of silence.

What is it with the SNOOZE button? It encourages only undesirable traits. Mediocrity, tardiness,, sloth. Well, that accurately summarizes the offenders. I wonder what the original design was supposed to achieve? What sort of luxury the inventor figured he had stumbled upon? Was it akin to heated towel racks or chemical glove and boot warmers? Kind of defeats the purpose of an alarm clock doesn’t it?

I now have a resolution. To permanently disable every snooze button I find on an alarm clock and to never again use one. I will lead by example and practice my crusade of common courtesy, ‘outside the box’ consideration and punctuality. This I swear to uphold, at least in fifteen-minute increments.

One part water, 3 parts gangsta

2008-08-29T09:10:00.000-07:00

Running through the sand on Alamitos Beach, I think to myself, 'thank God I am not barefoot'. How I miss the days of soft sand sprints, running the tide line as water and sand go to work as a loofa on the old feet. Nowadays, 2 inches of duomax and solyte separate our union.. and about 2 millimetres of styrofoam, a drinking straw, some El Pollo Loco wrappers, a used condom, three soiled nappies and countless strains of rogue bacteria.

What is it about Long Beach that cause the people to not care about its appearance or functionality? Sydney-siders would verbally abuse, then physically beat anyone who eats their noxious take away food then drops the wrappers, the styrofoam and half the meal, whilst they walk off with reckless abandon. I just don't get it....

Why does the USA still allow the use of styrofoam? It was outlawed in Australia in the early 90's. Do I need to move back there to escape it? I mean, seriously. There are countless products that will just as efficiently wrap or contain food with even better thermal retention and liquid-tightness properties. Is styrofoam really that much cheaper and lighter? It certainly does not bio-degrade and the trash dozers on the beach only act to shred and smash it into harder to pick up pieces, a calling card we will leave for our great grandchildren.

An exercise in futility perhaps? I have been told to change the things I have control over, to accept the things I cannot change, and to have the wisdom to know the difference. Perhaps wisdom is not a trait I have matured into at this age, for I cannot see, for the life of me, why certain things like this are tolerated. That and water wasting (look for a future post along with video. Yay!)

So back to the sandpit... the really dirty, festy, render-me-an-ear-infection one. It's no wonder property prices on this beach are lower than anywhere else in the state that has a direct water frontage. It's no wonder no one swims. Except all those kids in shirts and jeans..... (now, now)
So what is the solution in my opinion?
Eliminate the Breakwater, at least in part, and institute an environmental awareness campaign that actually ENFORCES (a strange word around these parts) the legislature. The rest will sort itself out naturally.

Until then, I will run and cough and splutter and be generally pained by the level of apathy.

I will enroll in a yoga class (ironically, I just typed yoda class), to deal with my inner demons.

I will continue to sporadically volunteer for the CLEAN ALAMITOS BEACH, 2nd Saturday of every month pelican-walk (or was it flamingo? Or pigeon?) Regardless, I will trudge the sand for about an hour whilst passers-by mutter 'I wonder what he did?' I figure cleaning this place up seems so banal to most that the only way I would do it would be through mandatory community service.

I will continue to stoop and pick up someone else's COLT 45 can, another's lip gloss and a over populated families $2.49 chicken and soda family value special.

I will cringe and stifle my yack when I shake my gloved hand to dislodge last night's euphoric, random, tight and dark encounter; yet thankfully safe, savored in a micro-thin, pink flavoured and studded prophylactic souvenir case and I will continue to fill more bags like this one (pictured).

Anyone know the sorority girl that may have lost this badge? I want to return her genetic souvenir too.... never know when that might come in handy.

Woopty Woop Mutha Wooooot!

5.8

2008-07-29T18:17:00.000-07:00

Thought I should let you all know that we are okay. A 5.6 –5.8 hit this morning, shortly before noon. Shook the place up pretty good. I was 7 stories up in the office shitter... Washed hands, walked out the door, felt a few pounds lighter; figured that was a good sign, then felt immediately nauseous.... And thought some homer in the WC must have slipped me something. A real feeling of inner-body imbalance. Could the morning constitutional have been that profound? Or was I experiencing some sort of early thirties stroke of sorts? WTF?

I turned into the hallway to watch it snake and roll before my eyes, tossing me softly side to side (like walking down the bow of a ship) I thought 2 things.
1. I have definitely been drugged.
2. I better get down this hallway before the bag men hog-tie me and get me into the back of some drive-by van to question me about last month’s shipment to Panama.

Then I realised this was my first earthquake of magnitude. Weird.
Throwing the office door open I announced that people should stand in the door frames. Funny how all the PSA paraphernalia comes back when you most need it...
My twenty year old assistant looked at me, riveted to her now sliding around the floor chair, filing cabinet drawers sliding open and shut, doors swinging and slamming closed, and she scrunched up her face and began to cry, in that little kid (well , I guess 20yr old) way.

“Camille. For fuck’s sake. Get in the door way.” Empathy has never been my strong point.

40 odd seconds later the heaving and shaking subdued to a gradual roll. The building is on rollers itself (thankfully) skated around back and forth what felt like a good 2-3 metres. Trippy indeed.
Looking out my window and watching the cars roll the extent of their handbrake or park-gear engage on the rooftop parking of the structure opposite, I realised that nature has an inherent knowledge of this sort of thing. The birds had been clustered together in large flocks the past few days, nervously squawking and circling around, almost too timid to land anywhere. The morning was unusually overcast and even cool. Those same birds now looked at me through the glass, their beady, black, lifeless eyes cawing - “Told you so. Silly fucker with the corner glass office.”

Once diminished, I confronted our publisher Mark who lamented that he had been stuck in the elevator on the way up the entire quake and felt nothing. Whilst he begged for big comeback aftershock, I excused myself, grabbed Camille and headed over to the pub for a couple of pints to take the edge off.

Very strange feeling indeed. Aftershocks are predicted for the next 2-3 days.
So, happy to say that Shelby and I are fine and the condo is still standing. Shame it didn’t come a few days earlier – could have helped me shake the tiles off the wall of the bathroom and saved the jackhammer rental.

1 part water, 3 parts Gangster

2008-06-14T08:26:00.000-07:00

Running through the sand on Alamitos Beach, I think to myself, 'thank God I am not barefoot'. How I miss the days of soft sand sprints, running the tide line as water and sand go to work as a loofa on the old feet. Nowadays, 2 inches of duomax and solyte separate our union.. and about 2 millimetres of styrofoam, a drinking straw, some El Pollo Loco wrappers, a used condom, three soiled nappies and countless strains of rogue bacteria.

What is it about Long Beach that cause the people to not care about its appearance or functionality? Sydney-siders would verbally abuse, then physically beat anyone who eats their noxious take away food then drops the wrappers, the styrofoam and half the meal, whilst they walk off with reckless abandon. I just don't get it....
Why does the USA still allow the use of styrofoam? It was outlawed in Australia in the early 90's. Do I need to move back there to escape it? I mean, seriously. There are countless products that will just as efficiently wrap or contain food with even better thermal retention and liquid-tightness properties. Is styrofoam really that much cheaper and lighter? It certainly does not bio-degrade and the trash dozers on the beach only act to shred and smash it into harder to pick up pieces, a calling card we will leave for our great grandchildren.

An exercise in futility perhaps? I have been told to change the things I have control over, to accept the things I cannot change, and to have the wisdom to know the difference. Perhaps wisdom is not a trait I have matured into at this age, for I cannot see, for the life of me, why certain things like this are tolerated. That and water wasting (look for a future post along with video. Yay!)

So back to the sandpit... the really dirty, festy, render-me-an-ear-infection one. It's no wonder property prices on this beach are lower than anywhere else in the state that has a direct water frontage. It's no wonder no one swims. Except all those kids in shirts and jeans..... (now, now)
So what is the solution in my opinion?
Eliminate the Breakwater, at least in part, and institute an environmental awareness campaign that actually ENFORCES (a strange word around these parts) the legislature. The rest will sort itself out naturally.

Until then, I will run and cough and splutter and be generally pained by the level of apathy.

I will enroll in a yoga class (ironically, I just typed yoda class), to deal with my inner demons.

I will continue to sporadically volunteer for the CLEAN ALAMITOS BEACH, 2nd Saturday of every month pelican-walk (or was it flamingo? Or pigeon?) Regardless, I will trudge the sand for about an hour whilst passers-by mutter 'I wonder what he did?' I figure cleaning this place up seems so banal to most that the only way I would do it would be through mandatory community service.

I will continue to stoop and pick up someone else's COLT 45 can, another's lip gloss and a over populated families $2.49 chicken and soda family value special.

I will cringe silently when I flick into the trash bag last night's euphoric, random, tight and dark encounter; yet thankfully safe, savored in a micro-thin, pink flavoured and studded prophylactic souvenir case and I will continue to fill more bags like this one (pictured).

Anyone know the sorority girl that may have lost this badge? I want to return her genetic souvenir too.... never know when that might come in handy. Woopty Woop Mutha Wooooot!

Thirty-One

2007-11-20T16:18:00.000-08:00

Tuesday, November 20, 2007
Thirty-One
Current mood: contemplative
Category: Life

Today is the last day I am 31. Infact, I will be 32 in exactly 42 minutes. Isn't it strange that we so desperately wanted to be older, old enough to stay up and watch the movie. Old enough to stay out later. Old enough to get into that ride at Wonderland. Old enough to drive. Old enough to drink... legally. Old enough be taken seriously. Old enough to be respected. Then all of a sudden we are past all these restrictions and we simply want to stop time. Punch the clock.

Sometimes I even think that I would give it all back to relinquish myself of any of the debt, problems, hassles, responsibilities. Cares. Issues. Knowledge. Sometimes, ignorance can truly be bliss. Who said, "I would take the awe of understanding over the wow of ignorance"?... or something like that anyway.

So, tomorrow I am 32. I have spent most of this year telling people I was 32. Why?
I think I will spend the first half of this year telling people I am 31. To make up for lost time.
That's all I do.... is lose it. Time is the one great leveler. It waits for no man and evens all scores.

31 it is then.

4:18 PM (+5hrs) - 1 Comments - 0 Kudos -

Sailing the South Seas

2007-05-21T15:19:00.000-07:00

Monday, May 21, 2007
Sailing the South Seas
Current mood: restless

"I've always wanted to sail to the South seas, but I can't afford it." What these men can't afford is not to go. They are enmeshed in the cancerous discipline of security. And in the worship of security we fling our lives beneath the wheels of routine - and before we know it our lives are gone.

quotation from Sterling Hayden (1916-1986)

10:19 AM (+5hrs) - 1 Comments - 0 Kudos –

Dreaming of Denny's

2007-02-23T17:08:00.000-08:00

Friday, February 23, 2007
Dreaming of Denny's
Current mood: contemplative

I was in a hole in the wall Denny's last night, in Bishop, California... (Northern California?) on the way back from Mammoth, after 4.5 hours in the hospital. No, I was not hurt.... Jesse's pinky was though. *cough*

I noticed an old man at the table to my left. Alone. Greasy denim, oily, slicked hair. A weathered hat, pulled low on his brow. A weary, element-hardened face, hands like welding mitts. Sad. Remorseful?

Lonely.

I was startled by the thought that I could end up like that. Easily. How would I feel? As much as I like solitude and the soul-fortification it delivers, I do not like being alone that much. There was a time. I learnt alot about myself then. I am past that now though. More evolved. Or am I?

The old man made me sad. Made me reflective. Made me worry and made me..... all at once.

I wonder if he even ackowledged loneliness? Or if he had become numb to it?

Everything can turn 360, so easily.... if you let it I suppose.

"Sometimes I still think of you,
and I just wanted you, just wanted you to know,
My old friend.
I swear I never meant for this,
I never meant....
Don't look at me that way,
it was an honest mistake..."

12:08 PM(+5hrs) - 1 Comments - 0 Kudos

Time to make a Change

2007-01-31T10:52:00.000-08:00

Wednesday, January 31, 2007
Time to make a change....
Current mood: anxious
Category: Goals, Plans, Hopes

I feel it coming. A surge. Like fear choking in my throat. *cough* Get out. Imposter. It is soon or never. I like the challenge, the fresh-ness of it all. The excitement, yet I am warily afraid of it. Perhaps it is just respect for the power of it. The imminent failure that can await, with the slightest misplaced step.

I'll take it. Not now. But soon....

Reminds me of a new t-shirt I wanna get Regina to bust out.

"Procrastinator's Convention - Meets Tomorrow"

"They say the devil's water, it ain't so sweet

You don't have to drink right now.....

but you can dip your feet, every once in a little while..."

10:52 AM - 4 Comments - 1 Kudos

A year from today...

2006-09-21T12:47:00.000-07:00

Thursday, September 21, 2006

Current mood: contemplative

I will tie the knot.
Panic. Joy. Resolve. Commitment. Excitement. Respect. Structure. Adulthood.
Making something of my life. Embarking on my next BIG journey.
I feel like the time is right, the person is right and the stars have aligned, now, my mind is right.
THIS is right.
"Right here, right now there is no other place I'd rather be."

"I wanna hold the hand inside you, I wanna take a breath that's true..."

7:47 AM (+5hrs) - 5 Comments - 4 Kudos

Eazy Like Sunday Morning....

2006-03-12T08:08:00.000-08:00

Figured, I'd post some of the old stuff. Back when I checked Myspace. Back when I could choose a sweet, little .gif avatar to illustrate my current state of mind. Sorry the avatar doesn't translate. You'll have to suffice with good ole text.

Sunday, March 12, 2006
Eazy Like Sunday Morning....
Current mood: bouncy

What was Lionel Ritchie thinking? I like Thursday morning. One day I'll again awake to coastlines and sun crackling on white sand, until then lawn sales and barking dogs will suffice.

I prefer the 'Faith No More' version.

Saw a play last night.... been awhile since I have been in the real theatre. Felt good to be back. Couldn't put words to how I felt when I walked out. I guess that means it was a good play? Thoughtful? Frustrated?
When will the US, when will this town, embrace racial evolution and move on? When can we say that reparations have ceased? When is enough, enough? As Marek said, "Every leading civilization has been built on the sweat and toil of slaves." Egypt, Rome, India, Modern Europe, Australia, America. I believe it's time to hang up this coat in the old wooden closet, the one that smells of camphor and move on.
Time to go for a run....

1:08 AM (+7hrs) - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos